It is hard to take a look inside when you pass by the mirror without recognizing anyone. Look up and there’s a stranger in front of you. Familiar face. Reticent eyes. Robotic expression. Was it in a wax museum? Perhaps it was out of expectation that you forgot who you were. If you aren’t continually reinventing yourself, then who do you become? Staying the same surely doesn’t mean you stay yourself. Aliens populate this planet and, if they aren’t careful, become too comfortable in the foreign skin they briefly occupy.
I’m not one for becoming too comfortable. Is staying ahead of your own curve being on edge? It’s probably even slightly paranoid, but small doses of paranoia, like alcohol, sugar or other numbing poisons, carry positive effects. Stay on edge, stay sharp. If you’re not at least one step ahead of yourself then you only become your own shadow. Sometimes I spend some time under cover of my shadow and think that it feels good — to sit there, spoiling in darkness. Then I long for my face. Without my face, I am unidentifiable, indistinguishable. Let’s keep my shadow riding my coattails, I’ll run the show. I’m more suited for the bright lights and big stage, anyway.
Who are we to share a thought all to ourselves? I’m thinking it, you’re thinking it, he’s thinking it, she thought it a long time ago, but we sat on them like all those young days, where we lied to our parents without any real reason to. Who are we to judge ourselves for a thought? In the future, thoughts probably will punish like we already perceive they do, and when that day comes, who knows what will become of me, but until then… let me think. What’s the worst that could happen? Something could come of it. I don’t know, but the word ‘could’ has never brought me anything in my life. My luck is more neutral than the wind. Cut out the histrionics. Chain them up. You can feed them, but make sure that plate is always just out of their reach. Too much fear of others. Even if there is a holocaust, there’s no more sense hiding from it anymore. Take me for what I am.
Misinterpret instead. Who do you think I am? What do you think I am? Maybe I don’t know either. Say very little so everything writes its own story, fills in blanks and takes creative liberties; become something else. Or use every word at your disposal and say nothing at all. Maybe…
Don’t mean to.